Word Count: 1,042
Characters/Pairings: Dave Karofsky
Disclaimer: I don't own Glee and never will. No copyright infringement intended.
Spoilers: Up to Furt.
Summary: Karofsky needs someone to talk to, but he doesn't know who. And so he's alone.
Dave Karofsky is falling apart. He doesn’t know what to do except lash out and bully others. And he can’t tell anyone what’s bothering him either – Dave is terrified of their reactions. Actually, he’s terrified of a lot of things.
Hiding behind walls is the easiest thing for Dave to do, even if it leads to him nearly getting expelled. He wants to apologize to Hummel, but he doesn’t know how to do that. Dave never meant it when he told Hummel he’d kill him if he let his secret out, but the other man doesn’t know that. And now he’s transferred to another school. Dave never should have kissed Hummel like that, either. It was the wrong thing to do and he figured that out almost immediately. Dave needs to apologize to the other man for a lot of thing, actually.
The Glee Club is not happy with them for “forcing” Hummel to go. Dave knows it’s his fault and he doesn’t need them to throw it in his face all the time.
Dave’s parents are at a loss of what is wrong with their son and want to send him to therapy to get to the bottom of his issues, but he’s refusing. It would probably help, but Dave doesn’t want to go to therapy.
“What happened to our sweet little boy? Dave changed overnight.” Melanie Karofsky didn’t understand why her son’s attitude had changed like this, why he was bullying this Kurt Hummel.
“I don’t know, Mel. We need to figure out what’s wrong with him.” Tom had his suspicions on why Dave was acting the way he was, but he wanted his son to come to him first. He was okay with his son being okay. Tom didn’t understand why Dave couldn’t tell them.
“Will you two shut up?” Dave could hear his parents outside his door and all he wanted to do was be left alone. Was that too much to ask?
“David, we’re just worried about you. What’s wrong, Baby?” Melanie was worried. She just wanted to help him through whatever this was.
“I’m fine, Mom. Will you leave already? This is my room and I don’t want you in here.” Dave tried not to wince at the hurt look on his mother’s face. He wanted to apologize to her, but something stopped him.
“Let’s go, Melanie. We need to respect our son’s wishes. But we will talk to you soon, David. You’re not getting out of this.” Tom wasn’t letting this go.
Dave scoffed. “Whatever.” He knew he’d eventually have to tell them, but not if he could help it. What if they hated him once (if) he told them the truth? What if they didn’t want as their son anymore? Dave didn’t want to disappoint them, and that’s exactly what he was afraid he’d do.
Melanie sighed and followed her husband out of the room. They weren’t getting through to Dave. “We need to figure out what’s wrong.”
“I know we do, Mel. He’ll tell us what’s wrong when he’s ready.” Tom knew he would. Dave would break soon. Then again, he was already falling apart and they couldn’t help him.
“I don’t like this.” Melanie wasn’t going to let her son’s attitude go. She’d get to the bottom of this eventually. She and her husband went downstairs to eat dinner. Dave normally loved eating, but he had told them he had no appetite when they first came upstairs.
Dave rolled around and faced the other side of his bedroom. He wanted to cry, but refused to let the tears fall. He would be strong, or at least try to pretend he was.
Dave would love to talk to someone, anyone, about what he was going through, but definitely not one of those therapists his parents were talking about. Maybe that guidance counselor at school. He couldn’t remember her name.
Dave wanted to like girls, he really did, but he didn’t. Why couldn’t he just like girls? He wouldn’t be tail spinning like this if he did. Dave’s life would be so much easier then. He saw the way Hummel got treated. Actually, most of the time, he treated Hummel like that, but others did too. Dave hadn’t been alone in bullying his classmate.
Everyone would turn on him if he admitted the truth and told them that he was gay. It was a logical conclusion. But hiding who he was wouldn’t turn out well for Dave. It was already tearing him apart.
Kurt wasn’t the only boy that Dave was interested in. He had liked someone a few years older than him, who graduated last year. He also had crushes on a few male actors, but Dave would never admit to that.
Dave knew his parents were worried about him, but he didn’t want them to be. He had to deal with this on his own. He could do this – keep his secrets to himself.
He fell asleep to the sounds of his parents laughing. Dave had nightmares all night – Mostly about telling his parents. What usually happened was that they told him they didn’t love him anymore and they’d proceed to kick him out.
Dave was up around 3:30AM because he couldn’t fall back asleep. His mind kept going back over his nightmares. He didn’t want his worst fears to happen. His parents probably wouldn’t understand. He didn’t know how they felt about gay people. Dave hadn’t heard them talk about the subject before.
It felt like he was drowning, and Dave didn’t know how to escape that feeling. He had felt this way for a long time. He really didn’t want to feel this way anymore, but it was out of his hands.
He had heard that Hummel’s father accepted him and went after anyone who insulted his son. Dave knew the last one from personal experience. He hoped his parents reacted like that, but he was afraid they wouldn’t.
Dave Karofsky was falling apart and there was nothing anyone could do about it. His walls were up and they weren’t coming down any time soon.
He was a sad, scared teenage boy who had no one to turn to for help.
And Dave Karofsky had no idea what to do.